The Marriage of Nerissa and Phobos
by strayphoenix
Summary: Because SOMEbody had to do it. NxP. ON HIATUS until I think of something that will top off all the craziness I've covered so far :P
1. What Kind of Super Villian Are You?

_**The Marriage of Nerissa and Phobos**_

"And you said I had no **VISION**! You just ran around your home planet blowing shit up!"

"What good is ultra power if you can't have a little fun?"

"It's no good at all!"

"Says you who has four preteen girls as sidekicks! _I_ have a giant snake!"

"_Excuse _me? We are in our early twenties you asshole! How old are you? Forty?"

"**I AM TWENTY THREE!"**

"HA! I'm twenty **TWO**!"

It had been four hours since the fall of Meridian. In a weird twist of fate, the Seal of Nerissa/Scepter of Phobos had cracked open during the fighting releasing those captive inside of it. Suddenly, Phobos had a rival for the conquest of meridian. Kadma was able to separate the Heart of Meridian from the Heart of Zambala since she was its rightful owner. Only to have Nerissa steal it back, however, to settle her personal score with Phobos and regain her full power.

"You actually felt **BAD** for killing that stupid redhead? What kind of super villain are you? I've killed hundreds of civilians and do you see me regretting it? **NO**!"

"What I **SEE** you doing is sitting all prissily on your stupid throne so you won't sweat out your hair gel"

"I **DO** **NOT** wear hair gel!"

"Just like you don't bleach your hair?"

"**I DO NOT BLEACH MY HAIR!"**

"You expect me to believe it's that color on **ITS OWN**?"

"Actually…" Elyon piped up from her bubble.

"**SHUT** **UP**!" they both shouted at her simultaneously.

"Dickheads" Elyon grumbled leaning back against the wall of her bubble. Nerissa had imprisoned half of the fighting forces using her Heart's power while Phobos imprisoned the other half. Of the actually important people, Phobos held the four ex-Guardians, Will, Matt, Julian and Caleb while Nerissa held the real Yan Lin, Elyon, Cedric, Miranda and I.T.C.H.

Holding equal ransoms for one another, having Hearts with equal power and each wanting both those Hearts just as much as the other had kind of brought a lull to the battle. After an hour or so of just attacking each other which proved unsuccessful because of the balanced power, they had reverted to standing ten feet away from one another and shouting insults until they could think of a better plan.

Three hours later…

"So what if you've been stuck in some rat-ass mountain for ninety years, I—"

"It was **FIFTY** years!" she corrected.

"Who the hell cares?! **I** **WASN'T EVEN BORN**!"

"Good thing too! Then I would've had to deal with your **ASS** **UGLY** **FACE** for all that time!"

"Oh yeah? Well…" It dawned on Phobos that he didn't have a decent witty comeback. He'd used almost all of them in the last five hours. "**WELL** **YOU'RE STUPID**!"

"I've got a question" Hay Lin commented to Aldarn, Drake and Elyon, the other occupants of her bubble. "Are they going to rip each others heads off or rip each others _clothes_ off because at the time being, I really just can't tell"

"I know" Elyon seconded. "I mean, Caleb and Cornelia fight just as much and just as _tacky_. You can't tell if they love or loathe each other"

"Are you kidding me?" Cornelia retorted, floating in a bubble nearby containing Yan Lin and some Lurdens. "Even I come up with better comebacks than _this_"

"I'M STUPID? YOU'RE UGLY!"

"YOU SUCK!"

"BASTARD!"

"BITCH!"

"DICK!"

"TRAMP!"

"YOUR MOTHER WAS THE SIZE OF A WHALE!" Nerissa's voice broke as she shouted.

Hay Lin clamped her hand over Elyon's pissed off mouth before she could say anything much to the amusement of Aldarn and Drake.

"MY MOTHER IS **DEAD**! YOUR MOTHER **DIS-OWNED** YOU!"

"MY MOTHER IS **DEAD** TOO! _YOUR _MOTHER **DIS-INHERITED** YOU!"

"WELL YOU'RE STUPID!"

"**_YOU SAID THAT ALREADY, JACKASS_**!"

"I CAN SAY IT AGAIN IF I WANT TO! I CAN DO WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT! I—"

Then, out of the complete and total randomness of nowhere, Nerissa filled the ten foot gap between then in one swoop and kissed Phobos. Dazed a bit at first, Phobos kissed her back.

"…my…god….are….they…?" The words wouldn't come out of Will's mouth. Julian's jaw was unhinged in such a way, that he wasn't sure he'd be able to close it ever again. Matt covered Mr. Huggles eyes and basically everyone stopped what they were doing to watch the weirdest sight in the world. The only one that seemed un-phased was Irma and only her bubble companion Taranee caught it with her telepathy.

"IRMA!"

"They're shouting was starting to give me a migraine" she responded with a shrug. "So I suggested they shut up for a bit"

"Well _I _suggest you _un-_suggest it now" Cassidy demanded, snapping her fingers in front of Caleb's face. "I think Caleb's fallen into a coma"

* * *

Thought it was a good place to end it. I've read it over maybe fifty times and I laugh my ass off every single time. :) 


	2. I Can Totally Feel the Love

Caleb came back to reality with a snap. Actually, the correct terminology would be a slap. As in, a slap across the face.

Caleb blinked his eyes a couple of times trying to refocus when he was slapped from the other side of his face.

"Dammit, Cassidy! I'm awake! _I'm awake_!"

"Actually, it was Yan the second time" she informed him as Guardian Yan Lin shrugged her shoulders innocently.

He groaned. "What happened?"

"Um," Yan began reluctantly, "that did". She pointed in the direction of Phobos and Nerissa.

"You know, I never really noticed how low the back of your guardian outfit ran" Phobos murmured.

"You like it?" Nerissa purred between kisses, "I designed it myself"

"Kinky"

"**_AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! MAKE THEM STOP! MAKE THEM STOP! MAKE THEM STOP!"_**

"Alright, alright, I'll make them stop" Irma shouted over Caleb as she stood up. "This is getting worse than 'Talladega Nights'"

A couple moments passed by and nothing happened. All the prisoners glared at Irma.

"I'm trying! I'm trying! I don't think I'm getting through" she complained.

Cedric, who was now in the bubble right next to her, looked surprisingly even greener than he usually was. "Dear god, I think their using tongues"

"Irma!" Cassidy snapped, "Fix this now or I will put **_you_** in a coma!"

"Hey! Psycho Romeo and Psyco-er Juliet!" Irma shouted, banging on her bubble trying to get their attention, "We're all done throwing up! You can go back to hating each other now!"

She and Taranee both yelped as a bolt of lightning headed straight for their bubble. Lucky for them, balanced power and all, it deflected off.

"Nice shot" Phobos commented.

"Thank you, Phobey" Nerissa responded

"_**PHOBEY?!?!?!" **_everyone who wasn't Nerissa or Phobos shouted.

"I think I'm going to need therapy" Matt blinked. Mr. Huggles had all his hair on end, almost as if he understood what was going on.

"I think I'm going to need an air sickness bag" Drake said, queasy. Elyon, Hay Lin and Aldarn backed away from him as far as they could.

"You know, we could do great things together" Phobos said, drawing back from Nerissa.

"I was thinking the exact same thing, Phobey" Nerissa responded as she popped a foot with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"Nerissa, will you marry me?"

"**_NO!"_** every single person who wasn't Nerissa shouted. She on the other hand, put and finger to her chin in thought.

"I'll do it on three conditions" She leaned in a whispered something in his ear. When she drew back Phobos was glaring at her. She put her hands on her hips and held her chin high.

Finally, Phobos gave in. He crossed his arms and sighed. "Alright, I won't kill your ex-husband and you can have Elyon's chamber"

"**Hey!**" Elyon shouted.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaand?" she pressed.

In a voice thick with self-loathing, he growled "And I won't lay a hand on your annoying, mealy-mouthed, myopic, do-gooding, and possibly gay rebel brat"

"I can totally feel the love" Cornelia quipped.

"Perfect!" she squealed. "I'll do it!"

"But what are we going to do with all the prisoners?" he asked, looking around at the bubbles.

"We can use the ones we want in the weeding. I say we murder all the expendable ones and use them as wedding decorations for the palace"

"Murder? You sick animal! I **_LOVE_** it when you talk like that! C'mere!"

"Well," Will commented as she made a face and they began making out again, "you can't deny that they're perfect for each other"

"Oh dear," Kadma spoke up from her bubble. "We seemed to have lost Julian as well" The prisoners turned towards Kadma's bubble and saw Julian sprawled out on the bottom of it.

Her Royal Highness of Zambala gave the former rebel leader a kick in the ribs. "Get up, you wimp. It's not like you have any more reason to drop unconcious than the rest of us"

"Rissa's his ex-mistress" Cassidy informed her.

"Never mind, stay unconscious"

"**HEY!"** Caleb shouted suddenly, "**WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'POSSIBLY GAY'?"**

* * *

This chapter has some reference to a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon and a story on fanfiction called Macneto (under my faves in case your interested). W.I.T.C.H. is not mine.

Before the reviews come in, I would like to restate a fact of life: 'the original will **_ALWAYS_** be funnier'. Unless, the original totally sucks. So please, no reviews on how you liked chapter one better because it was funnier.

Despite the popular belief, I'm not God. :D


	3. Therapy money is coming from YOUR pocket

Wow. The 'possibly gay' joke worked better than I thought. Must follow little subconscious voice of crude humor more often…

At some point I mentioned that WITCH wasn't mine, right?

* * *

Cedric paced back and forth in front of the door where Nerissa and Phobos were supposedly discussing their wedding plans. He didn't like the idea that they were getting married but he didn't like the idea of him attending the wedding as gift luggage more. He rocked back and forth on his heels for about a minute, fighting the urge to listen in on his master's conversation but in the end, pressed his ear to the door anyway. 

"Why on Meridian would you even want a _**gift registry**_?! You'll be living in a freaking palace!"

"We have them on Earth and I always wanted one" Cedric heard her respond with a pout.

"First off, what would we put on it? Second of all, where would people get it? And third of all—"

Cedric didn't hear Phobos' third of all as his voice was suddenly muffled. Cedric assumed it wasn't a silencing spell.

"Alright, alright, you can have a gift registry" Phobos grumbled. If Cedric had known women could bend him so easily, he would have found Phobos a girlfriend a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time ago.

"I'll write it up immediately as soon as we're done with this" she said. With a dreamy sigh she added, "I've always wanted a waffle iron"

"What is that? Some sort of torture device?" Phobos asked in confusion.

"Aw! You're so creative!" Cedric heard Nerissa squeal. He tried his absolute hardest not to imagine what was happening on the other side of the door when after a moment or two, it opened sharply and Phobos threw Cedric into the room by his collar.

"You could have said 'come in'" Nerissa chided, mirroring Cedric's thoughts.

"Takes too long" Phobos shrugged and pulled a lever on the wall. One of the magic bubbles dropped down from the ceiling containing the sleeping form of Caleb. It paused and hovered a foot above the ground, and unaware of the danger he was in, Caleb continued sleeping.

"…of course, Cornelia…_snort_…anything you want, baby…I didn't know you liked…_yawn_…fish…"

Phobos exchanged a look with Cedric and then sent Nerissa a pleading glance. "Just a _little _torture, Rissa? Only 6000 volts? Pleeeeaaaase?"

Nerissa shot him a _**no**_ glare and kicked the bubble. Caleb woke up staring at Nerissa's heel and shot his mother an annoyed look as he sat up in his bubble.

"Therapy money is coming out of _**your**_ pocket I hope you know"

"Once we conquer the universe, I'll sign us up for some family yoga" she said off-handedly as she came to stand with Phobos in-between Cedric and Caleb

"No, no no, mom, I, um, think I'll still need a therapist. _Especially _afterfamilyyoga" he insisted fearfully.

"Whatever" Nerissa replied, "Right now, we have an announcement to make: We want Caleb to be the best man at our wedding"

"You do?" Caleb and Cedric asked in unison.

"We do?" Phobos asked his bride-to-be in surprise. "I thought we brought them here to decide"

"_You_ brought them here to decide. _I_ already made _my_ decision" she replied snootily.

"Um, mom, it's OK for Cedric to be best man. I have no problem not walking the wedding" _…and being three worlds away when it occurs_ he added to himself.

"See, Rissa? I told you he wouldn't want to walk! Let Cedric do it" Phobos was adamant.

Cedric didn't know who he feared the most but at the moment the look Phobos was shooting him even if it was a sideways one out him on the prince's side. He bowed his head at Nerissa.

"But I insist that it be Caleb!" she persisted. "He's the same height as Cassidy, our maid of honor"

"Mom? Let Cedric be the best man. I'm OK with it. Really."

"I honestly have no problem with it either" Cedric chimed as politely as he could. Nerissa looked like she was seriously having her buttons pressed. _Bad image, BAD IMAGE!_

"Yes, Rissa. Let Cedric be my best man" Phobos insisted.

"Phobos!" Nerissa exclaimed, now upset. "He's my _**son**_!"

"_**HE TRIED TO KILL ME!**_" all three men shouted at her at the same time.

"Then _**GET OVER IT!**_" she barked with a stomp of her foot and a crack of lightning that struck the top of the castle. This thunderous crash was followed by a scream that sounded an awful lot like Matt but no one noticed it. "Caleb is going to be our best man! That is _**FINAL!**_"

"Mom, look," Caleb began in an attempt to be diplomatic. "The best man is supposed to be the helper of the groom and Cedric has been acquainted with Phobos a lot longer than I have. Not to mention that he's actually willing to help him prepare and _what __**the HELL**_ _am I __**saying!? MY MOTHER IS MARRYING AN EVIL LUNATIC!!**_"

"You're mother _**is**_ the evil lunatic" Cedric muttered to himself as poor Caleb buried his face in his hands in disbelief and exasperation and looked about to cry.

"Well," Nerissa said after a moment of considering what her son said, "I suppose that we could have two best men…"

"Except for the small problem that I would _still_ refuse to be _best_ man to _that_ man" Caleb replied as he recovered, pointing at Phobos who blew him a raspberry.

"Caleb, you must understand that Phobey had a troubled childhood" Nerissa said with a sympathetic voice which seemed as ill-suited for her as—well, marrying someone that looked like Phobos.

"Rissa!"

"Yeah, so did I!" Caleb countered, "_**HE**_ was my troubled childhood!"

"I was hoping I would have to resort to black mail…" Nerissa smiled under her breath as she pulled the same lever Phobos had and another bubble came floating down from the ceiling, this one containing a sleeping Cornelia.

"…_snore…_that totally hits the spot, Caleb…_snore_…oh _god, _that feels…_**snore**_…damn amazing…"

Nerissa kicked her bubble **a lot** harder than she had kicked Caleb's. "Not with _**my**_ son you don't, you slut"

"I could've listened to that a little longer" Cedric said innocently. Phobos kicked _him._

"Here's the deal, Caleb," Nerissa said turning to her son and turning away from his fuming girlfriend, "you become our best man or we turn your girlfriend into a sofa for the guests"

"You cannot sit people's asses on me!" Cornelia exclaimed.

"Of course I can" Nerissa replied smartly. "And I will if—I mean, _unless_—my son agrees to be best man at our wedding"

"You are such a twisted, _diabolical_, _**ancient**_, _**homicidal **__**WITCH**_!!"

"_**I AM TWENTY-TWO YOU INSOLENT WHORE!**_" Nerissa shouted and another crack of lightning lit the sky and hit the top of the castle tower. Again this was followed by a high pitched scream which no one seemed to notice. Once she recovered, Nerissa flipped her hair over her shoulder and smiled. "Other than that, thank you, my dear"

"All right, if it's to save Cornelia's life, I'll do it" Caleb sighed.

"You'd better!" Cornelia told him closing her eyes and holding her chin high.

"Though a sofa might have been an _improvement_…" Cedric said to himself. Phobos heard him and gave him a low five behind his back before approaching Nerissa.

"Alright, now to discuss the entertainment" Phobos spoke up as he once again pulled the lever on the side of the wall and another bubble started descending from the ceiling. Nerissa levitated Caleb and kicked Cornelia out of the way.

The bubble that floated down contained Matt. All of his hair was sticking up in all directions and his eyes were wide and appeared to be bloodshot. He looked like he'd been electrocuted which, in fact, he had.

"Whoa, what happened to you?" Caleb asked. Matt simply glared at Nerissa who smiled back sweetly.

"I thought you'd be used to it after all my tantrums at the cave" she said pleasantly. Cedric observed that Phobos seemed to be having second thoughts as Matt tried to improve his appearance.

"Now, Phobos and I have agreed that we want you to provide the music at our wedding," Nerissa began. "I've already send Lurdens to abduct your fellow band mates, drug them on a potion I made that smells like Olive oil, and bring them here so I can mind wipe into believing they're _**not**_ performing in an evil Medieval castle. They will also bring their instruments as well as yours so you can begin practicing _Evil Angel_"

Matt blinked. "You're a Breaking Benjamin fan?"

"Of course she's not!" Phobos scoffed. "I'm the Benjamin fan!"

"My life is over" cried Caleb.

"And what if I don't want to play at your wedding?" Matt asked, testing the waters.

"We'll turn your girlfriend into a hat rack!" Phobos said almost a little too cheerfully.

"Alright! Alright! No need to drag Will into this," Matt replied quickly.

"See how smoothly things go when we all get along?" Phobos said with fake cheerfulness. Cornelia, Caleb, and Cedric simultaneously flipped him off from behind.

"Now to see to the catering!" Nerissa declared as she grabbed Phobos' arm and dragged him out of the room. "Let's see if those worthless subjects of yours can make anything low-fat"

"You know…" Matt said, rubbing his chin in thought once the couple had left, "Will _would_ make a good hat rack…"

From directly overhead could be heard a cry of disbelief as lightning lit the sky again.

Except that instead of striking the top of the tower, it came straight through the window and electrocuted Matt's bubble directly.

"**OK, HOW **_**THE **__**HELL**_** IS THIS **_**FAIR**_**!?!?"**

* * *

Thanks to **koolkame** for the hat rack suggestion. :) 

There totally aren't enough 'o's in the sixth paragraph.


	4. I Have A REALLY Bad Idea

Sorry for the late update. Life sucks. But I haven't abandoned this story!

* * *

Cedric burst in through the chamber door quickly and without knocking. The heavy wooden door swung back and hit the wall with a _clunk._

"_**PRINCE PHOBOS!"**_

His urgent message was about a second from coming out of his mouth but he stopped dead in his tracks.

"_**Cedric!**_" Nerissa shouted from the four poster bed.

"_**CEDRIC**_" Phobos shouted, tangled with Nerissa.

Cedric wheeled around and ran out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him without comment. He needed to find a hot poker. Immediately.

"The nerve of some henchmen!" Phobos scoffed at the now closed door. He smiled evilly at his fiancé. Surprisingly, Nerissa found it charming. "Are you in need of some snake-skin lingerie, my love?"

"What I am _in need_ of is a best man" Nerissa reprimanded.

Phobos mumbled something along the lines of _you never let my have any fun_ to which Nerissa smirked.

"You wouldn't call what we're doing 'fun'?"

Phobos matched her tone and her expression. "Well, isn't it kind of uncomfortable for you?"

She gave him a peck on the lips. "If we keep this going, I'm sure it'll get better"

She blew a little bit.

"Left foot red," she told him once the arrow had stopped spinning.

Phobos snuck his foot underneath Nerissa's and managed to touch the red _Twister_ dot. He almost lost his balance at the last minute but supported himself with his powers. Villains were supposed to cheat, weren't they?

"Yan Lin was right," Nerissa commented smugly at Phobos' strained expression, "it _is_ more fun on non-flat surfaces!"

* * *

"Dude! This place is awesome!" Nigel exclaimed looking around. "How on Earth did you get this gig?" 

"It wasn't on Earth…" Matt muttered to himself. He wasn't sure what Nerissa was making his band mates see but he was quite sure it wasn't a huge dark and eerie ballroom with an ancient chandelier having tables and chairs set up by creepy and apparently stupid Lurdens. One of them was eating part of a table.

"What was that, man?" Joel asked from his drum set.

"Nothing!" Matt called back. He sighed. "Let's get to practicing…"  
_  
_Matt started stumming the beginning chords to _Evil Angel_ and was about to get to the verse when he was interrupted by Nigel.

"Hey, that chick is hot isn't she?" Nigel asked Matt, pointing with the end of his guitar. Matt stopped abruptly when he noticed Nigel was pointing at a pair of Lurdens beginning to waltz around the room.

"Can my life get any worse?" Matt asked the creaking ancient chandelier above him.

As if in answer to his question, it gave its loudest creak yet and with a _snap_ started to fall. Matt dove out of the way just in time and it crashed just feet from his band mates who didn't notice a thing.

"IT WAS RHETORICAL!" he shouted up at the ceiling where Jeek hung, snickering.

* * *

"Again, _**why**_ are we agreeing to help out our psycho ex-friend on her wedding day?" Kadma asked in annoyance as she and Halinor reluctantly went through a bridal shop on Earth looking for a wedding dress with Nerissa's specifications. Which were quite a couple of pages long. 

"Because she's got the current Guardians of the Veil and the Queen of Meridian imprisoned and holding them for blackmail" Cassidy explained, looking at some maid-of-honor dresses. "Do you like this one?" she asked, holding up a blue strap-less dress with a high cut to her knee.

"Nerissa's colors are _black _and _purple_ Cassidy" Guardian Yan Lin sighed from the other side of the rack where there were more dresses. "And you don't seem too upset about this whole wedding thing. You think maybe Nerissa still has some mind-control thing on you? Since your maid of honor?"

"Of course not! I _am_ upset!" Cassidy responded. "It's just that I really think Nerissa will… _**oh! **_Purple!" she squealed and ran to the other side of the store where she'd seen a purple dress. She turned around to her friends who were all looking at her with bemused smiles.

"OK" Cassidy admitted, "Maybe a _little_ mind control…"

* * *

"So you're saying you can glamour the throne room to make it look _**exactly**_ like the sketch I drew for you?" Nerissa asked Phobos skeptically as she surveyed the throne room. 

"Anything your black heart desires," Phobos swore. Behind his back, Matt made a gagging gesture. Cedric, standing nearby, smacked Matt upside the head

Satisfied, Nerissa said, "Great! I'll leave you to it!" and she began heading off in another direction.

"Um, where are you going?" Phobos asked, worried at her mischievous expression.

"Well, _someone_ has to walk me down the isle" she said matter-of-factly before she disappeared behind the doors. Phobos stood in place for a moment before it dawned on him what she was going to attempt to do. He ran after her.

"OH NO YOU DON'T! I AM PERFECTLY HAPPY WITH DEAD IN-LAWS, YOU HEAR ME? _**RISSA**_!"

* * *

"This _**sucks**_" Taranee mumbled. "Two pair" 

Will smiled sympathetically as her friend laid down her hand of cards. The five Guardians and one Queen of Meridian were sitting around in one big united bubble playing with a deck of cards Cornelia had bribed one of the guards for. They did ask any questions but heard the words "Toby Keith" and "bikini" exchanged.

"Woot!" Irma whooped as she laid down her full house. "Pay up, suckers!"

"For the umpteenth time" groaned Elyon, "We're trapped in a large magical bubble and have nothing on us except the clothes on our backs and the hair on our heads"

Irma pondered that for a moment. "I'll take the hair if it's not too much trouble"

Hay Lin smacked her upside the head. Lovingly in a way only Hay Lin could do it.

"Guys, we need to think of an escape plan," Cornelia broke in, picking up the cards to shuffle them. She shuffled like an expert and was dealing again in seconds. Irma joked that she might have a career in Vegas if saving the world didn't work out.

"Cornelia's right," Will chimed. "We can't let them get married"

Taranee tapped her chin as she received her second card from Cornelia which was her universal signal for _I'm preparing to show off my brain and probably prove myself insane in the process. _

"Maybe we should let them get married"

Everyone froze and stared at Taranee. Cornelia stopped mid-deal with the card on the tip of her fingers. Elyon's jaw went slack.

"What?" she asked in disbelief.

"Think about it," Tara rationalized, "Maybe if they get married, they'll be too involved with each other to do anything successfully evil"

"But-but-but they don't even _**like**_ each other!" Irma cried out. "They only got together because of my bonehead suggestion! They'll kill us all if they got into an argument or divorced or whatever!"

"But what if they do like each other?" Hay Lin suggested. "What if they've always liked each other and were just too shy to express their real feelings? What if Irma just helped push fate along? That would be _**sooo**_ adorable!"

Hay Lin, the incurable romantic, sighed dreamily. When she noticed the looks she was getting which flashed _**'INSTITUTIONALIZE IMMEDIATELY'**_, she added hastily, "Well, you know, it _would_ be if it wasn't _Nerissa_ and _**Phobos**_…"

"Maybe Taranee's on to something, though," Will said after a moment in which Hay Lin turned pink. "But Candracar's not going to like it one bit"

"We don't have to tell them, do we?" Irma asked hopefully.

Expecting a snapping remark from Cornelia, the girls turned to look at her. She was lost in thought, scratching her neck with the card she still hadn't dealt.

"I have a _really_ bad idea," Cornelia confessed with a smile so bold it was bordering on mischievous.

* * *

I apologize to all of you who were traumatized by the images your minds created for the first part of this chapter. I do hope you laughed at yourselves afterwards though :) 

**Next** **Chapter**: The Wedding of the Millennium! That is, if Candracar doesn't have anything to say about it…


End file.
